Goodbye Ottawa

In sixteen days I will no longer be a resident of Ontario, it feels very strange to be honest. It has been about 10 and a half years since I moved to the Ottawa valley from Calgary Alberta. I have some fond memories of living here, though at times I wished I never set foot in this city.

I was 19 when I moved. Everything was scary, new and overwhelming. I had never lived on my own before, my parents lived an hour away and I knew no one in this city.



I rented a room in New Edenborough, with this crazy woman, her son and two other students. The kitchen area was beyond tiny, bathroom equally claustrophobic and my room was a freezer. I could not be on the phone past 10 or looney toons would come down stairs and yell at me , nor could I have anyone over. Let me say my stay there did not last long...I was out three months later.

I have had my fair share of crazy roommates and thieving landlords.All in all, it has been a learning experience.
I've also had my first relationship here, first job, first car, first heart break, I can go on and on.

I guess moving back to Quebec is not such a big deal since I was born in the province, but I'm not looking forward to having to switch over everything(licence, health card). Also the pain of having to try to find a doctor, I'm hoping my doctor in Ontario will agree to keep seeing me.

Pros: A three story condo for the price of a shit hole apartment in Ottawa, more selection of food in the supermarket, cheaper car insurance, cheaper child care(when I do have a child)
Cons: Lack of physicians, poor health care system, taxes, higher gas prices, lingering separatists.

Anyways, Happy St Jean Baptiste Day!

Summer Solstice

What is summer without a lovely sun burn, I look like a robin. Pasty white with a bright red chest...I do not look like an idiot.....I swear
I still wonder how my ancestors faired since the 1600's in this environment. We burn, we are a buffet for the horse flies and mosquitoes, we hate the cold....I can go on and on. Those few drops of native blood must be our saving grace.....I'm pretty good with finding my way out of the woods...maybe I should go on Mantracker(it's a show... look it up)

Weekend was great, spent quite a bit of time outdoors(obviously) and kept myself busy. I find I need to keep my mind occupied lately just to prevent the stress and sadness from taking over. It can be over whelming when so many things have changed in such a short time and I'm only human. Though I'm good at hiding my feelings, I do break down sometimes when I'm alone.

Saturday was Dragon boats. A friend's hubby was participating so we decided to go and cheer him on. It looked like alot of fun, something I wouldn't mind trying. We spent the day watching the races, walking about, avoiding the downpour and taking in the UV.
Exhausted and burnt, I decided to go on a trip to St Eustache. Trinity was insanely happy; squealing like a pig, mauling me with kisses and trying to climb all over me.

Sunday; spent more money. There was a huge sale on baby stuff at Sears so I decided to buy a car seat/stroller for my best friend......I'm a big giver :P.
I also got more stuff for the house; a lamp, bed set and bathroom stuff.
I also took my mom out for her birthday...again another big hole in my wallet.

Plans for this week.

• Lots of time at the gym
• Painting the nursery and starting the mural(no longer the polar bear theme, now a farm theme instead...I will post pictures when it's done)
• Final walk through for the house, find car and house insurance
• Finally go to the Spa

Hi my name is Akward, what's yours?

I'm going to blame my parents for not socializing me properly as a child ....yep I'm using my folks as my cop-out.





As a child my shyness was at times paralyzing. I often kept to myself, I did not have many friends throughout elementary and much of high school. Children as always were mean, my parents sheltered me as much as they could, which in the end made things worse.





I ran away from my troubles, I would walk home every day at lunch just to avoid having to eat by myself. When my best friend moved away in grade seven I felt completely isolated again. My parents used the referendum(though they wanted to leave Dorval for years and regretted ever moving there) as an excuse to leave Quebec and start fresh.





Calgary was my new start. A high school were no one knew me, perhaps a friendlier more open community to be welcomed into. Though still shy, I forced myself be more social, to try new things and just be thankful for whatever came my way. I still have very fond memories of the friends I made in Calgary. I like to call our group, the outcasts. We were the nerds, the artists, the fasionistas, the skaters, the goths etc. We did not discriminate against anyone.

This year marks the ten year reunion for 2000 grads. I could not attend, but I do want to some day go back to Calgary and reconnect with old friends.

Though still somewhat socially awkward, I know now that if people cannot appreciate me with all my flaws, habits, annoying traits etc, then they are not worth my time. I'll stick with my group of outcasts, those that strive to be themselves no matter what.

Another summer of blah.....

I'm tired of living out a suitcase, I want some kind of life again.I'm so fed up with everything right now I'm stating to slowly loose my mind. I work, watch TV and go to bed. I go out sometimes, but I long to go new places, meet new people and just have some fun before the summer is gone.

Being single at this age sucks, I feel like the third wheel all the time.

I'm not at all interested in meeting new men right now. Though I have made the pathetic attempt to go on dating sites, I must come across as some stuck up bitch because I never respond to emails. I'm far to self conscious to even attempt to go on any dates...there is still much work to be done on me before I can even take that step.

I blew off the chance to hang out with some friends this weekend, instead I decided to drive to my Mom's to check on the dog. Kind of pathetic right? I think so lol.
I haven't seen her in two weeks....my mom is doing her best to keep the pup entertained. I will be ecstatic once the move is over, painting is done, Reno's done, furniture is in and I can have a life again.
Going to have a small house warming party in August, a new house always needs to be broken in and some potential gifts don't hurt either.

Pain in my back and a whole in my wallet

I'm sitting here is pain, high on meds with a therma patch on my back. I'm pissed that I can't enjoy the rest of my weekend, but what can I do. I pulled something in my back yesterday, I took some Tylenol and blew it off. When I woke up this morning the pain was worse, I popped some more Tylenol and went out. By lunch time I couldn't move, I couldn't bend forward or get up.....I wanted to go to the hospital.

My folks went to the pharmacy to get me a back brace, thermapatch, Tylenol back pain and rubbing lotion. I'm 29, you would think I was 50 the amount of stuff they got me, oh well I love them :)

Drove around Aylmer looking for some flooring centres, couldn't find anything. Again got lost, roads were closed again and so gave up for this weekend.

Instead I went and spent over 2000 on furniture at Leons. I got a new mattress, bed set, couch and love seat, coffee tables and a futon.

Still quite a lot to do, less then a month until I move :)

Wowza, it makes individual cups of coffee

There is this futuristic coffee machine at work with neon blue lights, it is spiffy. You put in little packets of whatever coffee flavour you can imagine and it brews you a cup. Now if only they had one for a cafe latte and I would be set...or do they already have one? hmmm.

I'm in week two of work.....I'm surviving so far. I hate changes, I hate having to start all over again and at times I have anxiety attacks over it.
Training was A LOT of information to process about the association, different memberships, different types of malpractice insurance, questions from international students etc. I'm still learning and apparently with renewal time coming up everything will change again.....I'm in for a shit show :S.
People here are super nice, very helpful and patient. I do miss HC though, I miss my colleagues and despite the insanity of the program, I didn't mind so much what I was doing.

I'm going out Wednesday with some friends from HC and some past colleagues who have moved onto other positions. It should be fun to catch up.

Thursday meeting a friend in Aylmer, Friday movie night, Saturday government test, Sunday is Dad's birthday. I should be purchasing the last few pieces of furniture I need this weekend as well.

I know I said I would not get into specifics on this blog, but in reality I'm just 1 out of 6,800,000,000. I'm sure there is someone far more interesting then me to read about.

Crowded

Wow I miss my own space. Don't get me wrong I really appreciate having a place to stay until my house is ready...but I miss being able to do what I want, when I want.
The last week has been ...long. Training at the new job, finishing school(got 89% in biology), barely sleeping( I don't sleep well in other people's homes), another interview.

Eating has been bad. I haven't gotten groceries, cooking in a strange kitchen...eh. Trying to make meals everyone else likes is a pain in the ass. I haven't gotten to the gym yet in over a week. I'm hoping next week will be a little less stupid.

Trin, Gwen and Nova are all in St Eustache. It was hilarious watching my dog nearly pee herself when I came....she acted like she hadn't seen me in a year...super cute.

I got vacuum today and some new pillows. I'm looking to get a new bed since I left my old one with Brad. Man I have alot of crap to buy.